SO my mom fainted in church...

I finally went to shurch for the first time in forever lol.
The whole time all i'm thinking about is how I need to lose 10 pounds ASAP
If I had a dollar for everytime I said I was going to go to the gym...I would be able to pay for liposuction lol

Anyway throughout church all im thinking baout is how skinny my mom is now and constantly comparing us. She laughs when she sees what i'm doing. Then a little while later, starts staring at my nails. "they're so perfect, why can't I have nails like yours?" I do have good nails... and teeth.. and hair. I mean the teeth are because of braces and bleaching... but still. Then she tells me that she guesses that we can never have everything we want. Then I realized that I CAN have what I want. It's up to me. My mom will never be able to grow long, beautiful nails. But I can, and will be skinny.

Then I go up for communion, come back to my seat and I have no idea where my parents are... I notice people looking back a couple pews behind me... turns out my mom fainted.... She ate breakfast... oatmeal (70) blueberries and almonds... and water...
I dont really know what happened, we can't figure it out. I think her sugar was just low? idk...

Anyways, last night was realllly fun with brad... however we ate, too much It was between a frozen pizza or lean pockets... so I had the lean pocket... then brad made the other one for me, then gave me part of a Musketeer bar.. Totaling a whopping 920 calories. Can you say fuck my life? The lean pockets were made of spinish, artichoke, chicken and whole wheat though, so im not tooo worried about it sticking around.
I told my mom about it this morning and she said well did you have fun? and i said well yea... and she says well as long as you had fun then dont stress. I like that way of looking at it.

So I was 160.2 this morning. 1.4 up from yesterday.
I haven't pooped in a while and I know its all food weight...

8/21: 160.? : 158.8
8/22: 159.? : 160.2 :( foooood weight for eating so damn late.
8/23: 159.?
8/24: 158.?
8/25: 158.?
8/26: 157.?
8/27: 156.?
8/28: 156.?
8/29: 155.?

I was doing great all day too.
O well, Im not that far off and I know i'll be caught back up...

Well probably not tomorrow lol

We're currently on our way to my cousins grad party.... what the hell happened to having then in June? lol
Listen to this spread:
Turkey
Stuffing
Cheesy potatoes
Green bean casserole
apple pie
pumpin pie
mashed potatoes

the list goes on...
Therefore I will be eating. I guess I consider this a freeish day? Im still going to eat small portions. But I know if I don't let my self eat, the night will end in a pumpkin pie binge..

I WILL be working out this week. Between packing, planning, shopping, cleaning, working,.... it will happen

I for real think my kidneys hurt? lol like when I hit them they dont... but it's just my lower back.. posture maybe?

My new favorite thing to do it cut up a pear into little pieces and then put it in a zip lock bag and slowly eat it...
God I want to weigh 149 sooo bad right now... but I guess 155 should be my goal for now :)

Alright lovelies! Im off to read blogs, and then eat lol.
Wish me luck? haha
I promise you all starting tomorrow morning I WILL be back on track and I WILL lose weight in the next 7 days for college :)

xxx
Lilah